Darkman III: Die Darkman Die (1996)

 

Maybe it should come as no surprise, but in this case, the third time most definitely wasn't the charm. The first 'Darkman' is a fun ride, the second is serviceable, but nothing special. This one stinks to high heaven, which is rather quaint as it was filmed at the same time of the second outing. 

Go figure.

Seeing as Durant is dead, they substitute his character for a very similar character with Jeff Fahey's Rooker, who is - of course - a wealthy man who deals in drugs. When Darkman foils one of his deals, Rooker wants our intrepid hero dead. 

Who knew?

There is a weird subplot about a doctor trying to replicate Darkman's strength, which now seems as a superhero-type thing, but in the first one was explained because he doesn't feel pain and his adrenaline goes into overdrive. But here, it gets some separate treatment that doesn't make any sense. Heck, at one point, Darkman gets a device implanted that does give him pain, but he quickly removes it in the most absurd way ever and is never mentioned again. 

Thanks for that pointless idea then. 

There's also another subplot about how Darkman starts to develop feelings for Rooker's wife and child, as Rooker is of course an absolute arsehat and his wife and kid suffer from his evil dealings and so on and so forth. Nope, this doesn't go anywhere either. 

It's pretty impressive how not impressive this film is. No nifty camerawork, no interesting plot, nearly all boring characters and sub par acting... It is painful to watch. They even reuse footage from the previous films SEVERAL TIMES. How's that for lazy? Heck, even the ending is absurdly abrupt. You wanted closure? Well, blink and you'll miss it. 

The acting is pretty awful. Sure, Arnold Vosloo is okay, but the rest is horrendous. And Jeff Fahey either underacts to the point of wanting to check if he's still alive, or he chews the scenery to bits. It really is something to behold, if only for the batshit insanity. 

Not much to say, really. It is pretty awful all across the board.