Sharkman (aka Hammerhead) (2005)

 

Alas, this is no superhero film about a person who gains sharkpowers. Would have been cool, though. No, this is a low budget horrorfilm that is pretty awful in numerous ways, but it's like a trainwreck unfolding before your very eyes: you know it's horrendous, but you can't stop watching. This one is a lot of fun to pick apart, though. 

On a remote island (because of course) a crazed scientist, driven to grief after his son was diagnosed with an incurable form of cancer, starts to experiment mixing DNA in order to find a cure. He does, but it has some side effects. Because the scientist used shark DNA, his son now resembles a half-man, half-shark hybrid that is fairly aggressive. For some reason, he also has to mate with a human female in order to bring about some new superior species. 

Yes, we're in that insane 50s idea. Bear with me. 

The scientist lures a couple of people onto his island with the promise that he has found a breakthrough cure for cancer, but in fact it is to get revenge on the company that fired him for his insane experiments. So he unleashes his son on the party, in the hopes that he will kill most of them ànd finally successfully impregnate one of the ladies who happens to be the former fiancée of his now mutated son. 

And the biggest badass of the group is the IT-consultant. Yes, really. 

There are quite a lot of things wrong with this one. The editing is a shambles and literally all over the place. Sometimes, scenes get cut short for no reason and the makers clearly had no idea on how to establish direction of movement or establishing shots. You'll inexplicably see the locale change dramatically, even though the locations are supposed to be right next to one another. The dialogue is riddled with lines even a braindead camel wouldn't come up with. 

No, I don't know why a camel would write a script either. 

As is that wasn't enough, the CGI used is piss poor. They recycle a lot of shots of the sharkman and the explosions (especially the one where the base blows up) are absolutely laughable. The rubber suit of the sharkman isn't shown a lot and only in glimpses, which is for the best, because the display it on the back of the DVD and it looks, well... Let's just say it looks and leave it at that, shall we? It also feels uncomfortable for the poor actor inside of it and something tells me he couldn't see anything. 

But for all the ineptitude, there is a cast of people that feels way beyond what this film deserves, and two people actually try to make the best of it. One is our female lead Hunter Tylo, whom you may know from 'The Bold & the Beautiful'. She isn't a world class actress, but she does surprisingly well with the physicality of it all and can keep a straight face most of the time. The other one is Jeffrey Combs as the mad scientist, but he great because he's Jeffrey Combs and he always delivers. Heck, if there's one guy who can always play mad scientists to a T, it's him. 

Our hero is played - surprisingly - by character actor William Forsythe, but he is a weird choice. For one, he's a bit out of shape to be the dashing hero here, and he just feels completely miscast. It doesn't help that he is clearly just here for the paycheck. 

So no, 'Sharkman' is not something you'd recommend to most people. And yet, for all its glaring shortcomings, it is so cheesy and silly, it can be a lot of fun if and when you're in the mood for something you can laugh at and pick apart from start to finish.