Star Wars: Attack of the Clones (2002)

 

You know how often, the second part in a trilogy is considered the best part? 

Well then, maybe this is the odd one out, because this one is probably the worst of the prequel trilogy, mainly because it is boring and overly long. 

It hurts saying that, but it's true. 

We've skipped ahead about ten years. Anakin is now a full fledged Padawan under the wing of Obi-Wan Kenobi. When an attempt is made on now senator Amidala's life, both Jedi are assigned to protect her. This works well for Anakin, as he still has the hots for Padmé after all this time, only now he has grown up enough not to make it horrendously awkward. Through some detective work, Obi-Wan figures out that there is a bounty hunter after Padmé, based on the hidden planet of Kamino. There he also discovers that roughly ten years ago, a Jedi commissioned the build of a clone trooper army for the Republic. 

Yes, all machinations by the Sith lord who actually controls the Senate, yes. You did see this coming, didn't you? 

Meanwhile, there is a war brewing, because many systems have separated from the Republic and are amassing a massive droid army ànd building the ultimate weapon (aka the Death Star) under the auspices of Count Dooku. Obi-Wan heads out to investigate while Anakin and Padmé head for Tatooine, because he has nightmares about his mom. 

Pretty bizarre that he never in those ten years at least made an attempt to visit his mom again, but who cares about logic, right? 

Turns out his mom is now free, but also captured by Tusken Raiders. Anakin finds her and she dies in his arms, sending him into a rage and killing every last man, woman and child in the village. 

Yes, they're heading in the direction of the Dark Side. 

Obi-Wan gets captured and now Anakin and Padmé, who are head over heels with one another, head to Geonosis where Obi-Wan is held in order to free him. Turns out the Jedi are also headed there with the Clone Army and the battle that starts the Clone Wars takes place. 

Still with me? Because a lot happens in this one, maybe even too much as the characters race from one planet to another, barely giving you time to breathe. 

This is a very flawed entry in the series. Like stated earlier, it is pretty dull which is surprising, considering the amount of stuff they crammed in here. This is maybe the only one in the series where I often fall asleep halfway through. 

I know, right?

The acting at times is horribly uneven. It is unfair to lay all the blame on Hayden Christensen as Anakin. I mean, the kid is trying, but when the dialogue you have to spew is terribly contrived, it's pretty tough trying to make it work. But when he doesn't need to speak too much and can let his face emote, there is good there. I have sensed it. 

There are also inconsistencies and conveniences galore. R2 can suddenly fly? They discover Anakin's mom married the man who is the father of Luke Skywalker's uncle? They happen to stumble upon the clone planet? It's all a little too contrived and at times this can be awfully annoying. 

But there is good in this one. Some scenes work really well. The one where Anakin slaughters the Tusken Raiders is truly grim and is captivating. The lightsabre duel between Anakin, Obi-Wan and Dooku is great, right up until the point they introduce hopping Yoda, which instantly kills it. 

Egads, now there is something no one wanted to see. Everyone assumed Yoda was so powerful, he no longer needed to wield a lightsabre, let alone jump around like a frog on steroids. 

The casting of Christopher Lee as Dooku is a stroke of genius, as Lee is always a pleasure to watch. His voice and demeanour alone make him stand out as one of the finer points of this episode. The planet of Kamino and the interiors of the sets there are also beautifully otherworldly to look at. 

So, in the end, this is a terribly mixed bag. I wouldn't say the awful outweighs the good, but it is a close call. Some shiny gems in a pile of rubbish maybe isn't worth it. Heck, if 'The Phantom Menace' is more engaging (yes, even with Jar Jar), then there is something amiss.