Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (2016)

 Well, this film got a right bashing for some reason. Not as bad as 'Justice League', but holy fudgenuggets. Is this a glorious film? No, but it certainly isn't as bad as some would have you believe.

Also disclaimer: this review is based on the Ultimate Edition, which fixes quite a lot of the continuity problems the butchered theatrical cut does have. So there. 

It's been 18 months since the introduction of Superman and his massive battle with Zod that flattened Metropolis. Batman isn't all too convinced Superman is purely here for a good cause and wants to take him down. This won't be easy, but apparently Lex Luthor has a big chunk of kryptonite in his labs, in order to weaponize them for pretty much the same reason. Also, he is setting up Superman as this big bad for reasons.

No, they are not entirely clear. No, they don't explain it well. No, it doesn't really matter, you just need antagonists antagonizing, I guess. 

Superman is having conflicting feelings whether or not to save the human race, as some see him as a god and others as the devil. Yes, that age-old dichotomy. But things get out of hand rather rapidly and Superman and Batman will have a face-off, even though Superman is forced to and wants to work together in order to stop the villainous Luthor in his plot. 

That plot is to demystify Superman. That's just it. A fairly weak setup, but hey: callbacks to 'The Dark Knight Rises' and 'The Death of Superman', so wheee!

Yes, Superman dies. Sort of. Because we know he wasn't truly dead. He is only 'mostly dead', as Miracle Max would say. Yes, that is a reference and also yes: it comes from a brilliant film. 

There is a lot that works here. I know the casting was a big problem for a lot of fanboys out there, but I actually think Ben Affleck is a darn decent older Batman. Remember when people were all having a fit when Michael Keaton was selected as Batman and he was pretty friggin' awesome in the end? I wouldn't go as far as saying Affleck is awesome, but he is good in the role, if just a little too forced in the "Superman is evil, graaah!" department. 

I also really like Henry Cavill as Superman. I however don't like Henry Cavill as Clark Kent. The two are much too indistinguishable here. In the classic versions (Christopher Reeve), there is a very obvious difference between the two, as it should be. Here, Clark really is just Superman with glasses. The demeanour, the pose, the voice: all the same. It's a shame really, because Cavill is a very charismatic actor and he is a great Superman. Yes, on the oh-my-friggin'-god-look-how-muscular scale, he really scores and I'm totally fine with that. 

Gal Gadot gets introduced as Wonder Woman and even though she doesn't get a lot to do, she is fun to watch, and not just because she is a pretty face. When she is kicking ass, it works and she would even do better in her own film.

I even like the setup of the story. The final development of it all, maybe not so much. See, the Ultimate Edition clears away many of the glaring mistakes and plotholes the theatrical version has, but at three hours, it is quite a slog to get through. The story isn't just that engaging and too full of needless sidestories to get fully invested in. Everyone is mostly just waiting for the big showdown between Batman and Superman and unlike in the comic, it is a bit of a letdown. The final fight is more fun, but that has its own problems, which I will get to in a minute. 

By the way, the best parts are definitely the intro, where we see the battle of Superman against Zod from the perspective of Bruce Wayne and it is extremely well done. Also, most of the fight scenes with the humans (and Batman on occasion) are well executed. 

What really doesn't work, is the version of Lex Luthor on display here. Nothing against Jesse Eisenberg, but why oh why is Lex Luthor now suddenly an annoying twentysomething? He is sooo grating in every respect, because he is so hyperactive and jumpy it just becomes too ridiculous. You never believe he is a criminal mastermind, because no one told him to reign it in. He wants to steal the show with annoying mannerisms and it just doesn't work. Granted, Gene Hackman's Luthor was quirky and a bit of an oddball as well, but you could buy that he was a genius with a plot, because he never lost himself in idiotic behaviour. This Luthor is just... bizarre. 

And now for the main thing that even I dislike beyond all else: Doomsday. Yes, he is supposed to be in this film and I fear that was a big mistake. See, you could have had a decent film with just the Batman versus Superman arc, but no, they had to include 'The Death of Superman' as well, something that clearly deserves its own film. But okay, fair enough as a common enemy, that might have worked. But who on Earth thought the design we see on the screen was a good idea? I mean, it litterally is a troll from 'The Lord of the Rings'. This is not Doomsday, not by a mile. 

Or two miles, as is the case. 

Yes, that bugs me. If you want to do fanservice, then do it right. This half-assed attempt made no one happy. 

In the end, 'Batman v Superman' has its merits, but it is a little dull and too long to be truly enjoyable. But it is not as horrid as the Internet might have you believe. Give it a chance, but do go for 'The Ultimate Edition', as it solves a lot of the inconsistencies of the theatrical release.